This morning, one of my wonderfully inspirational friends, Tari "shorty" Sanders, posted this on her facebook.
EMBRACE
The article is about a woman, Taryn Brumfit, who posted a very unique before and after picture of herself to inspire women to love their bodies as they are. She asked 100 women to describe their bodies in one word. Most of the words she got back were "frumpy" "stumpy" "imperfect" "disgusting". So she is doing a campaign on kickstarter to fund an inspirational documentary to inspire women to love their bodies and to fight the media/societal pressures women feel to be "perfect".
I donated. Women need this support. Ok...I will speak for myself. I need this support! I need this reminder. Right before I sat down with my coffee and found this article I went thru a very familiar battle in my head. My lovely hubby bought donuts for us for breakfast. He rarely does that but on occasion the girls love it. Heck. I love donuts. So I starred at the donuts and wondered what power they will have over me? In a week I am heading to Florida and am going to be in my swim suit. I have absolutely no judgement of other women in their swim suits, but I am harsh on myself. I am a massage therapist and a health coach. I find every body beautiful and only want people to feel vital in their bodies. But here I am again this morning with the head battle about my body in my head.
I have been "thin" and I have been the weight I am now. Yep. Thin felt good. But I still obsessed about staying thin. At my current weight in the past, I obsess about loosing 10 pounds. It almost can induce a panic attack. For any of my clients or friends I would find it unacceptable for them to feel that way! But I beat myself up all the time. Until recently.
So when the battle started in my head, I forced my consciousness to kick in. I have talked with my Kabbalah teacher about the issues I have and she pretty much told me, no more trying to loose weight until I get the right consciousness about it. The right consciousness for me is about living a vital, productive life. Food as nourishment. Feeling pain free and energetic. This morning...I hurt. I know for me, sugar makes my joins hurt SO BAD. So why would I really want to have that donut? So I passed on the donut.
My other inspiration is my 16 year old daughter. She has recently dropped weight and did not want to. I believe it is just the genetics she has. But she cries a lot about having lost her curves. WOW! So many kids her age are trying to be stick thin and live up to the societal pressure of "perfection" and my girl wants curves! So what am I doing trying to be thin?! What do I really want? I want for my girls and for me, and for all people, to be healthy! Healthy does not come in a specific size.
Taryn Brumfit has received backlash, saying her after picture promotes obesity. I am sick of hearing this. Do we have an epidemic of obesity...yes! But it seems to me the people who throw up their arms and scream obesity over pictures like Taryn's need to take a step back and separate obesity, health and the image that they believe needs to embody healthy. Women have amazing bodies that do amazing things. Pregnancy changes a body. Time changes a body. But it doesn't make it any less beautiful. But the world wants thin, tight, and perky, and once you are not that, you are "imperfect" My perfect body sags after a couple of kids. But I am strong. I am healthy. I work out with a trainer, who I will forever sing the praises of, Morgan Paris, who will flat out tell you "I don't care what you look like. I care how you feel" She has helped me so much on my journey to be at peace with my body. I know I still have a long way to go on my journey. Sometimes the sweet treats win out and I feel awful the next day. But I can feel myself slowly detaching from the need to be perfectly thin and making food choices based on that pressure, and striving instead to feel active, pain free and amazing! I want my girls to focus on what they can do out in the world, not how thin they "need" to be. I am curvy. I am cool with that. I am happy with that. I refuse to stare at myself in a mirror anymore and see what I think I need to hate.
Do you know what else my friend Tari has posted on her facebook? A picture of herself in a bikini, rocking the most beautiful scars from surviving and thriving after massive open heart surgery to correct a congenital heart defect. She shared her battle with us and I know what that scar means and I think it is the most beautiful scar ever (next to my c section scar of course:) )
Confidence is sexy. Strength is sexy. Wisdom is sexy. Kindness is sexy. Battle scars from life are sexy. It's time to redefine sexy for women. It starts with you inside your own head. Love yourself and support other women in loving themselves. ACTIVELY LOVE LIFE!!!
Peace!
Julie
